I shall do a short blog entry before going to attempt to sleep again. I guess too much stuff running around in my mind is preventing me from falling asleep.

After being in different committees in Year 1, I decided to step out of my comfort zone to lead my own committee in Year 2. I have seen how people lead, pinpointed the good and the bad, and hoped that when I lead, I can amplify the good points, and avoid the bad points. I would say that I started off being that very nice guy who would listen to what everyone has to say. But sometimes, it is just not efficient. Yes, as a member, you would really appreciate your superior to listen to you, but when you are on top, things don't get done as quickly. Sometimes, it's still better to disseminate information in a top-down approach. People will ask if they have any queries, rather than shooting opinions all the time.

Secondly, I believe strongly in this. You will never stop worrying about your projects and events, unless you have a super solid team of people working for you, with you. This is exceptionally true for my case. I felt that for all the events, I have to interfere in one way or another so that things will run smoothly. One clear example would be when I let go a little for them to organize the event, everything just did not go well. It ended up with us topping up more snacks from 7-11. Having a good team means that you have members who are willing to make that extra sacrifice. Go that extra mile. Have that initiative that no one has. Most importantly, they must be able to see your full picture so that things can be carried out smoothly. I am glad that I have a few members who meet the mark, but I guess it's insufficient for me to feel at ease.

Prioritization is also a very important point. Sometimes, you have to rearrange your time so that you are doing the correct thing at the correct time. Tonight's supper was a clear example of how many of my members failed in this area. Yes, studying is important, I don't doubt that. But you need to study, others also have to study. And prioritizing would have you study before and after the event, and be present during the event. My only requirement today was for them to be present and facilitate the supper. However, only 5 of them were there the whole way. I would definitely accept reasons like jcrc meeting or project discussion. But studying, especially alone, and not helping with the set up and tear down of the event is a strict no-no in my book. At least some had the initiative to help out a little here and there. Some only appeared to eat, and disappeared again. To be honest, I was really disappointed at the turn-out rate today.

As my term of office as a block director is coming to an end, I would evaluate myself to be probably a 5/10. I believe that I failed in the area of motivating my members to work hard together. I can see that they want to be elsewhere, every time when we have our meetings and events. I can see that their heart is slowly, but surely, drifting away from the block comm as the semester continues. A committee is only as strong as it's weakest member, and I would say that Block 4 Comm this year may not have done so well. In fact, I wouldn't even have given ourselves a silver because of how the dynamics of the committee work. Sometimes, I do envy the other block directors for having such a hardworking committee.

I guess whatever I say can't change any facts, neither can it change whatever has happened. I shall just look ahead and step down peacefully. Hopefully, the next Block 4 Comm will become a better one.